Friday, March 7, 2014

Day 03: Greatest amount of physical pain I've endured

  • When Min shot me with a BB gun. What the hell, Min.
  • Duodenal ulcer. I can't believe I forgot this when I first published this entry. It just feels like a ton of acidic gas is stuck in your stomach and it just keeps building with no escape. You bloat, and you can practically feel your stomach acid just dripping and corroding your stomach lining. It's just a constant burn.
  • Getting bubbling peroxide in my eye. Didn't see the warning label (because there wasn't one. Thanks, Clear Care) and so I didn't know it was one of those solutions that you keep your contacts in for six hours. I thought it was 'regular' contact lens solution fit for direct contact on the eyes. Nope. As soon as I put the lens in, my eyes welded shut and it took two hands to pry my eyeball open to take the contact lens out, and my eye was crying for three hours and I flushed it with water for about half an hour. There's irony for you... the natural defense reflex was actually what was hurting me here. I hope I don't have corneal ulcers/burns...
  • It was August 25, 2005, and a red Dodge Ram 3500 rocketed into my side of the modest Honda Odyssey we were in. I recall having the wind knocked out of me and not being able to breathe. I ended up blacking out, but I could still hear everything going on around me--my best friend Elizabeth reacting in horror to the blood and her own pain, screaming my name trying to wake me up. I eventually could open my eyes again and immediately went hysterical and started bawling. I could feel the glass lodged in my forehead, the tingling in my left arm, and I feel like I had just gotten thrown around. I miraculously didn't break anything, though I did get a lot of contusions/concussions and bruises.
  • It was third grade, and we were playing some catch-up game where opposing teams started out in opposite corners of the gym, and we had to run to try to catch up with the other player. I tripped and got rugburn. I don't know why, but I just remember that being one of the most startling pains ever. I still have the scar, too (inb4 some of you make perverted jokes about how I should be used to rugburns by now. I hate you all).
  • I was 16 and I went to the swimming pool with my mom. I have no idea what happened, but I suddenly got the bends. I wasn't even in deep water... but I got charlie horses literally all over my body--my hands, arms, legs, abdomen, neck, feet, toes, fingers, chest. My muscles didn't stop spasming, and even my facial muscles were contracted to the point where I couldn't speak or breathe. Parademics said that the muscle spasming could have reached my heart if I didn't get helped in time. I don't know if that's quite true but it's odd to think about.
  • PERIOD CRAMPS I SWEAR THEY ARE GETTING WORSE WITH EACH MONTH
  • I was a stupid four-year old and I wanted to see if staplers worked on skin as well as they did on paper. 
  • I got a UTI when I was in fourth grade because I wanted to see how long I could hold my pee in. 24 hours, by the way. I ended up having to go to the ER (neither my mom nor I knew of UTI's so we didn't know what was wrong with me), and got a catheter put in me. That shit hurt.
  • Root canal. It wasn't as bad as I expected, but certainly one of the worse pains I've experienced just because it was so uncomfortable.
  • Using "Kanka" on a canker sore. Worst pain ever for a ten-year old.

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